Recent pics of 2015

These are pics that I cropped from various photos in my phone's album where I am posing for the camera.

In all of the pics, I'm wearing circle lens. Hehe.

#1

In this pic, I have only mascara on (You probably can't see it though...)

But would like to point out this is one of the instances where the line (of the left eye) is not meeting the corner of my eye (aka "Parallel")

Also, this is my most recent pic. Taken on 22 Nov 2015.

#2

No eye make-up on this pic.

Notice my eyelids get pretty 'squashed' when I am just slightly looking up to the camera.

#3

Oops, why is this the smallest...

The line on the right eye is not meeting the corner of my eye (aka 'Parallel).

Actually I think this is the same eye seen in #1 because this picture was taken using the front camera which the iPhone will then 'flip' because it's mirrored.

Anyway, yes, I'm still trying to 'prove' my eye is parallel. But I'm also trying to show you what can happen in situations IF you request for parallel. Depending on how your eye heals, you MAY not get the parallel that you expected. I am assuming most pple think parallel = way bigger gap between the line and the corner of your eye. And of course, the bigger the gap, the prettier the eye looks (in my opinion).

Have been thinking about how convenient (and I guess, happier) my life has been since I got the surgery done. I shall pen my thoughts down in the next post so as not to muddle up this one :)

Who will notice (part 2)

Read Part 1 here.

In Part 1, it seemed pretty obvious to others that I had surgery done. I now realise that it was because my eyes were still swollen!

Now that my eyes are not swollen anymore and I look normal, I am still observing whether people notice or not.

I placed them in 2 categories below-

Not-so-close friends/acquaintances: Don't notice at all. Including females. They don't even look at me weirdly or say things like 'You look different'. Or perhaps they're just trying to be polite... well, I'll never know.

Also, if it helps, prior to the surgery, I almost always had black eyeliner on.

Best friends: Pretty no-brainer. Yup, they notice. I do have best friends and really close friends that I unfortunately meet really, really rarely. One of my best friends who I haven't seen since before the surgery saw a photo of me on FB and immediately noticed and said I looked much livelier!

Day 152: Hi-res photos, including scars

Here are the photos of my 'scars'.

I think they're not really obvious unless someone is really, really close to your face. Like my sister told me it looks like a scratch. Maybe because it's a little bumpy. At least it is 100% skin-coloured!

And no, it doesn't bother me. I don't find it obvious.

I used a digi camera for this post to get sharper and clearer pics. All of my other pics in the previous posts were taken using the front camera of my phone.

Day 127

Erm, I admit I'm not "posing" my eyes well since it looks really lopsided and 1 eyelid is higher than the other but I did this deliberately to show that my eyelids eventually DID turn out to be parallel BUT it is hardly obvious.

This is true to what Dr Tay observed during my last review - that my eyelids are not actually touching the corner. Just barely touching only.

It is also hardly noticeable in photos but this is the best I could do to "prove" that my eyelids did not become tapered. 

Also, this is what my eyelids look like now. I will probably post one a proper one that is not so lop-sided next.

Finally, now that my eyelids are at their most natural state that I'm getting compliments on them. Hehe. I love them and am very glad I had them done!

I am still not putting eye make-up because I still haven't mastered drawing eyeliner on double eyelids AND it makes my eyes look weirdly huge (like wow).

I strongly recommend taking photos consistently because I am still in awe that months back I was actually telling myself that my eyelids were not that swollen when actually compared to now, they were freakishly swollen yet I thought they were normal??? Lol!

Really, take photos to keep track of your progress. It's so funny to look back at them and go like omg, how did I go out in public like that...

2nd review

Photos were taken on 22 June 2015.

I am very pleased with the progress and it definitely does not look swollen anymore. The scar is completely skin colored but I do notice it up close in the mirror. It looks like a little squiggly line. This doesn't bother me at all. I never expected it to disappear anyway. 

I went back to the clinic on 6 June for my 2nd review with Dr Andrew Tay. As I'm already satisfied with the outcome of my surgery (because nothing has turned out horribly and I'm already toward the end of my recovery process), I didn't have much to say to the doctor. Yet, as meticulous as he always is, he gave my eyelids a thorough inspection.

He asked me how I felt about the outcome and mentioned that the scars are still healing and will soon become barely noticeable (the current state is already good enough for me!). He also mentioned that I still have some more time to go before my eyelids settle (really? But they look so low already, oh no).

Finally, I made a comment that they didn't turn out to be parallel as I requested but I'm fine with the way I look now. Somehow he was very frustrated by this because he said that if we have a goal we should make sure we reach it. And I could tell he was really disappointed that he didn't manage to reach the goal with me. 

I still don't feel it's totally the doctor's fault because he is not able to control the way we heal and how my eyelids will eventually choose to settle.

He mentioned that my eyelids are also not fully tapered. And it's only noticeable when I look really closely, but indeed the there is a tiny gap between the lines.

I have my 3rd review coming up (omg, I've no idea why there are so many). And he'll be taking a concluding photo of my eyes then.

Day 45

Doesn't it finally look un-swollen now??!!

I am so happy and relieved!!!

But anyways, this was taken at night. I find that the crease is the lowest at night. And the most puffy in the morning.

I wonder if this is the final height? I hope so!

Day 37 (Video)

Omg, a video! 

Just to show my eyelid in motion, in case anyone was curious.

By the way, I have also started work at a new place this week. So far so good, nobody has pointed out anything wrong with my eyes. I don't think my eyes look weird anyway.

And tomorrow, I'm meeting some close long-term friends (males) who I haven't seen in almost 6 months so I'm curious if they will mention anything too. I may also try to put eye make-up for the very first time since the surgery.

Day 34 (1 month review)

Since I'm posting about my review, I might as well share a photo update from today too.

I went for my 1-month review today. Dr Tay said that my scar is healing very well at this 1-month stage, and no need for any scar cream.

(My scar is skin-coloured, and not as dark as the picture shows)

I'd owe thanks to the Vitamin C and collagen supplements I have been consuming religiously :)

However, my scar is still sensitive to me. He used a cotton swab to stroke over the scar and I felt a bit of pain. This is because I have barely been touching my scar and have not desensitized it. Even when I cleanse my face, I don't EVER rub my eyelids. I will only splash water or pat it gently to cleanse it. And it's a bit disgusting to say, but I have had stuff (dead skin?) stuck inside my eyelids... Yes, my eyelid is THAT deep that stuff can get hidden inside!!! So after finding that out, I decided to wipe my eyelids once a day with a wet cotton pad. I only started doing that recently, hehe.

Dr Tay noticed the dead skin and scabbing on my eyelids and used a tweezer to pluck them off. Haha! Then he measured my crease again and said it's exactly 8mm in height. 

I expressed my concern that a lot of skin/fat above my eyelid is hanging above the crease and the eyelid below the crease is still fat. He told me it's nothing to worry and I should see the final results in 2-3 months time. I have another review with him in 1 months time. I'm pretty surprised that he'd still take the time to see me every month despite his crazy schedule. I thought he will see me for today only and tell me good bye and call if any problems. Plus, all these reviews are free. (I know of skincare doctors who charge for reviews!!!)

Anyway, I still feel a tiny bit worried that the sausage lids will not go down. I mean, different skin-type will heal differently so who can really predict the exact outcome? I started becoming so worried because my friends told me of others who did the incision method and looked natural after 1 month only.

And I start to think back to all the things I did and didn't do. After removing my stitches, I thought that I didn't need to be so worried anymore and resumed my usual eating habits (including salty food) plus didn't sleep with my head elevated. I especially stopped eating pineapples because I got the worst ever ulcers. And pineapples are known to be great for deswelling. So I strongly feel that all these contributed to my slow de-swelling!!!

In the meantime, I will update sparingly (weekly or fortnightly) since there're barely any changes since 2 weeks back :( Comment if you have questions! Or suggestions! Or experience!

Day 31

I am not sure if my eyes are still swollen even though it looks like it. The crease is still very high and the lid is sausage-like. I am not sure if the crease is going down either.

I am a little worried because people who know me have pointed out that I still look swollen even though I feel I look pretty normal (if you were seeing me for the first time). Sigh...

I am going in for my review on 4 May 2015. I shall check with Dr Tay then.

Day 21

Who will notice?

Sorry, no pics in this post. But read on if you're interested anyway :)

I think the common obstacles most people face pre-surgery are:

1. No money
2. No time
3. Fear of what others will think (which may result in not being able to return to work or school)
4. A combination/All of the above

I have experience with some of the above and I have managed to avoid some of the above too. Let me elaborate.

I was determined to have the surgery done when I was 20 years old. I took up a job during my holidays and managed to save up enough for a cheap procedure in Thailand. Unfortunately, I did not have the time. I had 1 big window open before university began for me but that window also happened to be a huge festive season (Dec-Jan) where the plastic surgeon I wanted was away.

Finally, I graduated and started working so it was also time to build my career. I had the income but I didn't have the time. To rest well for the surgery, I needed about 2 weeks to a month to look presentable again. I am the wallflower-type and I hate when the spotlight is on me so I didn't want to deal with 'Hey! What happened to your eyes?' in the office. My next plan was to have enough saved when I was ready to quit my job so that I can get the surgery done before I start my next job.

But during the 3 years that I was working, I was so happy making money that I was also happy spending on other stuff too :p

I will be honest and say that it took me a really long time to save enough (for the surgery and emergency expenses). And days have gone by where I really question myself, why did I wait till I was 25? Why was I not diligent enough in saving money?

So if you are in the same position as my 20 year old self, please, please, save up!!! And get it done quickly! (Unless your parents are paying then good for you!)

Okay, back to my title. Who will notice?

Since my swelling has gone down considerably and I no longer feel like a fish-eyed freak, I decided to bravely attend a family+relatives gathering without hiding behind my spectacles.

Since my surgery, the only people who have seen me are my immediate family members and my boyfriend. 

I was very anxious to see who will notice but at the same time hoped that no one would (wow, who was I trying to kid...)

At the gathering of about 10 adults (the rest were babies, toddlers, kids, so they don't count!), 2 of my aunts noticed. The first one mentioned it RIGHT AWAY when she greeted me. The second one only mentioned it about half an hour later despite talking to me face-to-face plenty of times.

I was also amused that they knew it was plastic surgery right away. They didn't think I was using glue or tape or just had swollen eyes that day. It must've been pretty drastic huh?

I also felt a bit disappointed that none of them mentioned it was pretty. But then again, I don't think family are supposed to say 'Hey, you finally changed your eyes. Now you look SO much better'.

I guess I would feel better if they said 'The doctor did a really good job.'

But well, all I got was a 'TSK, you are SO VAIN'.

So, I guess it's safe to say, if your eyes were/are anything like mine... people will notice.

:( 

Day 15

After removing the stitches, I only used the ice pack once or twice. I also stopped applying the ointment 1 week after removing the stitches, as instructed by Dr Andrew Tay.

I just realised the bruising is mostly gone too!

Personally, I feel that my eyelids are still on the high side. Seems unnatural to me. But I don't know what a stranger who's seen me for the first time might think.

Despite choosing parallel lids, they seem to still be tapered. I don't really mind because at least it looks good, and it's possibly still swollen so the final results cannot be seen yet.

Some days, I look in the mirror and think to myself, this is not how I'm supposed to look like. Some days, I miss my monolids (WITH eyeliner, I could never stand them bare). It's not exactly the fault of my double eyelids but more that I am questioning my other facial features. I am now starting to find fault with other areas of my face, and feeling disappointed that after 1 surgery, I am still not the 'pretty' I wanted to be.

But, I am satisfied that I can leave my house, and to crowded spaces with NO eye make-up at all and feel that I look good enough :) This is a first for me. Back when I had monolids, and went out bare, I'd cringe when I caught sight of myself in a mirror.

I do feel prettier, I do believe I am prettier post-surgery. But just not pretty enough (in terms of my other features, I need sharper nose bridge, my eyes should be closer together, my face should be smaller, my complexion is horrible, etc).

I have STILL yet to apply make-up on my eye nor touch my eyelid with my bare fingers. I still feel squeamish. I don't know how some girls manage to do it after 2 weeks!

Oh yes, one more brilliant thing I adore post-surgery is how my eyelashes are sticking outwards!!! (They use to point straight downwards) I hope that this is not a side effect of still-swollen lids and I hope they permanently stay this way. I am dying to apply mascara and curl them upwards but as I'm still afraid of touching my lids, I do not want to deal with having to scrub the mascara off my eyelids.

Day 10

4 days since the stitches have been removed.

10 days since the surgery.

Bruises have not subsided at all. They are still present along the lash line of my left eye, down the slants of both eyes and a small area below my right eye (visible in the photo).

The bruises are the only hindrance right now. Aside from that, I really like this (still swollen) crease height.

I have yet to touch and wash my eyelids (ewww, I know) because I am really fearful of touching and feeling the wound. I think I am pretty traumatised after seeing the stitches on my eyelids. I still feel quite icky thinking about the wound. It is all in my head because I am not actually suffering from any pain nor sensitivity now. I just feel so squeamish about it! But I'd really love to give my eyelids a good wash after 10 days.

My Double Eyelid Surgery

Hi! I'm here to share about my double eyelid (upper blepharoplasty) surgery done in Singapore. I will update this blog as each month and year progresses. Leave a comment if you have questions!

Personal background

• 25 years old (at time of surgery)
• Female
• Singaporean Chinese, residing in Singapore
• Why I wanted the surgery: I did not like my monolids and disliked the way I looked without eyeliner. I relied on eyeliner A LOT. Not that I drew it very thick but doing a winged-tip made a huge difference for my eyes. I have only experimented with false eyelashes, eyelid tape and glue a handful of times so actually I am not used to seeing myself with double eyelids. I also wasn't sure if having double eyelids would make me look better but I figured that if almost every girl wanted it, then it must be able to help me right?

Doctor
Dr Andrew Tay (Full name: Dr Andrew George Tay) from The Plastic Surgery Practice, Singapore

Cost
Consultation - SGD$120 to SGD$180 (excluding 7% GST aka tax)
Incisional upper eyelid surgery - SGD$3,200 (excluding 7% GST aka tax)

Consultation
The doctor has plenty of well-known accreditation hanging in his office wall (National University of Singapore, Royal College of Surgeons of Edinburgh, University Hospital Basel, Switzerland, Academy of Medicine, Singapore). He is very nice, patient and kind. He explained procedures to me slowly and thoroughly. He never pushed me to do the surgery nor ask me to consider other surgeries.

He shared with me everything he knew about double eyelid surgery - the 2 different types of procedures, the 2 different types of eyelids that can be achieved, the pros & cons, additional surgeries (if needed), etc. Then he used a metal wire on my eyelids to show me the different heights and types of eyelids that can be achieved on my eyes. He noted my answers and reaction to each version.

The doctor advised me to use double eyelid stickers but,
a) I don’t know how to use them properly without the plastic bits sticking out so I felt that it's not an accurate representation of what actual double eyelids will look like, and
b) I have an insane fear that peeling off the tape will cause the skin on my eyelids to be weak & saggy - and I need the skin on my eyelids to be healthy & plump to withstand the surgery!

So yknow what. This might not be the smartest decision before surgery but I am just gonna wing it. Because from blogs I’ve read by people who have went under the same doctor, he usually spends about half an hour, perfecting the crease. I think that should be enough time for me to determine what I want. Right… right? Well, I just want something simple so I believe it can’t be that difficult to achieve.

Of course, I’m also pretty damn worried since it’s irreversible!!!

The receptionist would be the one to advise on the costs, payment methods & booking of the surgery dates. I was quoted SGD$2,900 for the stitching method and SGD$3,200 - SGD$3,700 for cutting method (all excluding GST). The price for the cutting method is due to complications that may arise and more surgery needed to resolve the complications. Unfortunately, they do not accept credit card installments (hahaha). Also, a 20% deposit is required to secure your surgery date. Surgeries have to be booked 1 - 2 months in advance because he is rather busy.

I left pretty satisfied to have all my questions answered and I wasn’t in any hurry to get the surgery done because I was still saving up. On top of having to save up for the surgery, I also had to save up to survive a couple of months as I was planning to quit my job (and I expected to be jobless for 1 - 2 months to recover + find another job).

Eventually, I e-mailed the receptionist again to place my deposit. Yes, I was going to save-a-date!

Surgery
Procedure: Short or minimal incision method (Selected by the doctor)
"The incision is shorter compared to conventional cutting method. In addition to a shorter scar, recovery time may be shorter compared to conventional techniques, with swelling subsiding faster. This method would be preferred if no excess skin needs to be removed. This procedure is usually done under local anesthesia (sometimes with light sedation) and takes 1-1.5 hours."

My appointment was at 2:45PM, 1 April 2015, and I was told to fast (not eat and not drink) from 9AM onwards.

I arrived and was given all of my medication (anti-bruising pills, painkillers and eye lotion) first. I only had to take 2 pills first (to help with bruising). Waited for about 15 mins then went into the Doctor's room. He used the metal wire so that we can confirm the crease that I want. He was very patient and made sure I saw all options before I decided. I settled on a parallel crease with 8.3mm height. I felt that tapered crease made my eyes look damn round, almost tear-drop shape like and I hated it.

Then I lay down flat on the reclining chair (like a dentist chair) while he measured and drew the markings on my eyes. This took 20 - 30 mins. He was being extremely precise. Then he asked me to check in the mirror again before we started.

The doctor wanted to insert a needle and plastic tube through the vein of my hand and I was so nervous! This was the part I dreaded the most because it’s supposedly the first and only pain you should feel before you become numb. And my friend told me it’d be a very thick needle. I couldn’t watch. It was indeed painful but bearable. Then the plastic tube was sticking out of my hand! Ewww!

After the nurse put in the sedation, I felt the sudden wave of sleepiness but it subsided really quick. I was still awake, I think? Because I totally didn’t feel and notice the doctor injecting the LA when I read that was supposed to be the most painful part. After 20 minutes or so, I began to be able to feel stuff especially something that felt and sounded like a laser? The Dr could see me grumbling a bit so he injected more LA for me.

When he started on my right eye, I was more aware and could sort of feel and imagine everything he was doing (cutting the eyelid, sewing...). Mostly just the sensation and not really the pain. But as for the sewing part, I did feel the needle poking and going through the skin, this part felt like ant bites but I was actually too lazy/relaxed to complain about it so I just kept quiet and tried my best to not move, hoping we are reaching the end soon. ALSO, I really did not want to distract him.

I guess maybe the sedation + LA doesn't really work for me? For reference, my pain threshold is rather high. Just that I am extremely squeamish and have a wild imagination so I tend to flinch a lot.

He asked me to open my eyes, look up, etc many times towards the end of the surgery.

Very quickly, it was all over. Only 1-1.5 hours! An ice pack was placed over my eyes and I had to lie down with it for almost 20 mins. I was fully conscious and active but the nurses refused to believe me, haha! I felt like a drunk person telling everyone I'm not drunk with no one believing me.

But I'm happy they made me use the ice pack for so long because when I looked into the mirror, aside from swelling, it wasn't red or bloody at all! It looked so clean! I couldn't even see the stitches which were hidden in my swollen lids.

The doctor said that my right eye was a little tough. He described the muscles as being "stuck up" and said that the right eye will swell more.

Because I have droopy eyes/ptosis, doctor asked me to train my eye muscles by opening my eyes big and looking up without help from my eyebrows.

My sister came to drive me home because we all thought I would be too drowsy to get a cab myself. In the car ride home, the area above my eyelids and my head started to feel achey. I popped the painkillers immediately.

Before

After - With stitches

Day 1 - 3: I applied the ice pack 3 - 5 times a day, 15 minutes each time. I just laid down on the bed and put some music on. It was very relaxing!

Day 2 and 3, bruises started forming along my lash line and down the slant of my eyes. (Compare Day 1 to 2, it looks like I have eyeshadow!) It was a bit scary :(
I felt the swelling was kept under control, it didn't increase but maybe decreased slightly.

Day 3 and 4, my right eye started to have sharp pains. But still bearable. May be due to the extra work he had to do on this eye.

Day 5, I accidentally poked right into the stitches of my left eye as I was reaching to scratch the corner of my eye. Omg, it was so painful :( Thankfully, no blood.

On 7 April 2015 (6 days after), I went back to remove my stitches. First, the nurse placed wet cotton pads and dripped water onto the stitches to get them wet. Then the doctor slowly removed the stitches. I was really afraid of the pain. Yes, it was painful but I felt really silly then because how come I can endure threading, waxing and tweezing my eyebrows but I am making such a fuss over just this!? I told myself to imagine he was just plucking my eyebrows and yes, it did feel like pulling of hair, one by one - the only difference is the "hair" is really low on your eyelids and he was pulling really slowly.

After - Without stitches

The scars are actually skin-colour, maybe slightly pink-ish. The darkness you see in the photo is shadow because the skin above the scar is hanging over the scar.

The bruising is still pretty bad on both eyes, they extend to the outer corner of my eyes, giving me a super slanted, droopy-eye look.

I actually like this crease height but I know it's going to drop. The doctor said it will drop by at least half this height!

I was very happy to remove the stitches because it means I'm getting closer to healing and seeing how my eyes will finally turn out! I also feel cleaner and lighter. Can you imagine not being able to wash a wound filled with dried blood and caked with lotion for 6 days :/

Having the stitches out also makes me more confident to leave my house and even look people in the eye without hiding behind sunglasses. Actually I think I look quite decent now except for the bruises.

The doctor said I'm healing very well but my eyes still look super droopy so he asked me to do more eye exercise. He also said I can wash my face as per normal but to be extra gentle on my eye area. He warned me that this is the stage where the scars will start to get bumpy. If it gets too bumpy, he'll have to start me on scar treatment. If not, then it will heal by itself. Fingers crossed now. My review will be in 4 weeks time. In the meantime, he said I can continue with the ice pack just once a day for about a week.

Things I prepared for the surgery:

• Vitamin C supplements to be consumed before and after surgery
• Cold packs
• Fresh pineapples (gave me killer ulcers though)
• Fresh pumpkin/pumpkin juice for de-swelling and healing
• Stayed away from salty food, seafood and dark sauce (Chinese beliefs)
• Facial wipes in case it's difficult to wash face
• Get eyebrows done before surgery!!! You don't want to have ugly eyes and brows.

Leave a comment if you have any questions! I will continue to update this space with pics.